We are so hard on ourselves, aren't we, Jane? It is actually ridiculous that we imagine we should be able to move and perform like we did when we were 20. Here comes a bit of a rant:
We are pummeled by these messages and images from media, though. From society.... There are actually so many more things we are better at now than when we were 20. I wonder why we don't value those skills and aptitudes as much? Well, I think I know why, actually! I think a large part is this off the scale value in youth that society has. I hope that is changing. I think that if enough of us are brave enough to be honest about the limitations AND the gifts of aging (like experience, wisdom, crystalized intelligence, perspective, patience, resilience, leadership, mentorship...), like you are here, maybe more people will be able to rest in the fact that it's not the busy, the pace, the youthful skin, the juggling that matters, in the end.
In the end (and in the process!) it's the quality of the relationships we have, the fact we can love and be loved, the ability to consider and be kind, and the perspective and wisdom to appreciate these fleeting days in this one life we have! And we older people can do these things much better now than we could in our 20's! Yay, us!
Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I truly appreciate it.
We are bombarded by those messages constantly, you know? On social media - it's become background! Society shoves so many standards for women.
At this point of life, I'm thankful for what I can do. I need a knee replacement, 2 actually so that is a challenge. I have to balance what I can do for now. It's a tough rope to walk sometimes.
Those gifts you mention are what I think makes a woman so beautiful as she gets older. In fact, not many 20 year-old can touch that type of beauty, and wisdom that comes from life experience and knowing yourself.
In the end kindness matters for sure! The most beautiful people I knew had beautiful hearts, like my grandmother.
As far as fitness. I'm getting abs, kind of a 4 pack, ha! ha! I never had in my 20s thanks to all of the core I've been doing for my back these past few years. My husband pointed them out. They might be under some sub q fat etc, but I know they are there ;).
I think you're doing great, but I understand. I have a foot/ankle problem that limits some things I can do. But, I have worked on it and regained a lot of function, so that's a win. And, in many ways, I'm stronger than I was 5 years ago.
I tried PT and massage, but what helped most was a chiropractor. He got my ankle unlocked. After that, I just found YouTube videos with exercises to help myself. It's been a long journey!
I relate, it's hard to let go of the body my brain remembers me having lol! Your handstand is beyond impressive to me btw, I was just thinking the other day how I haven't even attempted one in decades lol. (I do yoga, just not...that!). Agree we need to remember to be grateful to still be able to do what we can. It's too bad we don't appreciate our bodies' abilities more when we are younger (I didn't anyway!).
Hi Steffany! Thanks so much for commenting and reading.
I started to attempt handstand again a few years ago. I was able to kick up to a door and that was is. With tendonitis this is more shoulder and neck and so much easier than a headstand or handstand.
There's other workouts I can do with the bench too that doesn't involve inversion and it's pretty cool.
With my knees I'm limited to some yoga. Which type are you practicing?
It's a matter of perspective. I'm grateful that I can take walks, do yoga poses, get up and down from the floor, and clean my house even if I have to spread it out over 4 or 5 days. Many people who are my age can't do that.
How about 5 minutes of meditation after your walks?
Agreed on pets keep us mobile! I clean 5 litter boxes every day. I do my meditation on my own. But for guided Insightime is pretty good. I like Nicole's featured perfect health meditation https://insighttimer.com/nicolebayliss
The stories we tell ourselves drive our behavior. When other people's needs are more important than our own, we keep pushing to burnout when we physically can't do anything else. It takes practice to listen to our body as a guide and have that override the stories. You'll get there!
I find we keep relearning the same lesson until it sticks. Journaling, meditation, and therapy has helped a lot. For me getting still and feeling my feelings has been monumental in shifting my behavior.
Learning until it sticks. That's me 🙋♀️ . I'm glad I'm not alone with that. I think we all need to give ourselves grace sometimes. Thanks so much for your advice. I always appreciate how helpful your article are.
Two ways of viewing life as we age:
1. What we no longer can do.
2. What we still can do.
Too much attention to 1. is depressing. Focusing more on 2. is what gets us out of bed each day.
I hear ya and I don't always like option 1 😆. I think certain things can still be done in moderation. We have to weight it
We are so hard on ourselves, aren't we, Jane? It is actually ridiculous that we imagine we should be able to move and perform like we did when we were 20. Here comes a bit of a rant:
We are pummeled by these messages and images from media, though. From society.... There are actually so many more things we are better at now than when we were 20. I wonder why we don't value those skills and aptitudes as much? Well, I think I know why, actually! I think a large part is this off the scale value in youth that society has. I hope that is changing. I think that if enough of us are brave enough to be honest about the limitations AND the gifts of aging (like experience, wisdom, crystalized intelligence, perspective, patience, resilience, leadership, mentorship...), like you are here, maybe more people will be able to rest in the fact that it's not the busy, the pace, the youthful skin, the juggling that matters, in the end.
In the end (and in the process!) it's the quality of the relationships we have, the fact we can love and be loved, the ability to consider and be kind, and the perspective and wisdom to appreciate these fleeting days in this one life we have! And we older people can do these things much better now than we could in our 20's! Yay, us!
Hi Gayle!
Thanks so much for reading and commenting. I truly appreciate it.
We are bombarded by those messages constantly, you know? On social media - it's become background! Society shoves so many standards for women.
At this point of life, I'm thankful for what I can do. I need a knee replacement, 2 actually so that is a challenge. I have to balance what I can do for now. It's a tough rope to walk sometimes.
Those gifts you mention are what I think makes a woman so beautiful as she gets older. In fact, not many 20 year-old can touch that type of beauty, and wisdom that comes from life experience and knowing yourself.
In the end kindness matters for sure! The most beautiful people I knew had beautiful hearts, like my grandmother.
As far as fitness. I'm getting abs, kind of a 4 pack, ha! ha! I never had in my 20s thanks to all of the core I've been doing for my back these past few years. My husband pointed them out. They might be under some sub q fat etc, but I know they are there ;).
I think you're doing great, but I understand. I have a foot/ankle problem that limits some things I can do. But, I have worked on it and regained a lot of function, so that's a win. And, in many ways, I'm stronger than I was 5 years ago.
Thanks, Lisa! It is a challenge with foot/ankle issues, glad you are feeling better. What kind of work? Was it pt?
I feel stronger myself because of the exercises I am doing for this. Been in physical therapy and had massage/muscle therapy.
We got this!
I tried PT and massage, but what helped most was a chiropractor. He got my ankle unlocked. After that, I just found YouTube videos with exercises to help myself. It's been a long journey!
That's great that your chiropractor helped you. YouTube is great for exercise videos. There is a Dr Jo that is really good
I relate, it's hard to let go of the body my brain remembers me having lol! Your handstand is beyond impressive to me btw, I was just thinking the other day how I haven't even attempted one in decades lol. (I do yoga, just not...that!). Agree we need to remember to be grateful to still be able to do what we can. It's too bad we don't appreciate our bodies' abilities more when we are younger (I didn't anyway!).
Hi Steffany! Thanks so much for commenting and reading.
I started to attempt handstand again a few years ago. I was able to kick up to a door and that was is. With tendonitis this is more shoulder and neck and so much easier than a headstand or handstand.
There's other workouts I can do with the bench too that doesn't involve inversion and it's pretty cool.
With my knees I'm limited to some yoga. Which type are you practicing?
It's a matter of perspective. I'm grateful that I can take walks, do yoga poses, get up and down from the floor, and clean my house even if I have to spread it out over 4 or 5 days. Many people who are my age can't do that.
How about 5 minutes of meditation after your walks?
I am thankful too especially since I need both knees replaced. Not giving up on mobilty. I see it happen so much to people I see.
I think having pets keep us mobile too. I know my job does. I'm up and down all day.
I'll have to try meditation again. It's been a challenge. Are there any apps you use?
Agreed on pets keep us mobile! I clean 5 litter boxes every day. I do my meditation on my own. But for guided Insightime is pretty good. I like Nicole's featured perfect health meditation https://insighttimer.com/nicolebayliss
Oh yes the litter boxes!! It's a work out. I heard being able to get up and down from the ground is so important. So many don't need to do that.
So taking care of pets = good health!
Thanks for sharing the link with me.
Your welcome 🤗 Let me know what you think about it.
Will do! Thanks again!
The stories we tell ourselves drive our behavior. When other people's needs are more important than our own, we keep pushing to burnout when we physically can't do anything else. It takes practice to listen to our body as a guide and have that override the stories. You'll get there!
For sure! It's a lesson I keep relearning. I think we have to figure our why before that changes. What else has helped you, Janine?
I find we keep relearning the same lesson until it sticks. Journaling, meditation, and therapy has helped a lot. For me getting still and feeling my feelings has been monumental in shifting my behavior.
Learning until it sticks. That's me 🙋♀️ . I'm glad I'm not alone with that. I think we all need to give ourselves grace sometimes. Thanks so much for your advice. I always appreciate how helpful your article are.
I'm glad you like them Jane! 🥰
:)