@mikedeegan thank you so much for being my editor. I appreciate you reading and editing my work when I know you are tired after a long day at work. You are the best
Hi, Jane. I go with everything Jacob said. I just asked my therapist today if my new Substack connections are real friends, not like Rachel and Ross Friends. His answer was, Yes! I’m here, so I won’t be lonely, and you won’t either.
Jane, thank you for this vulnerable and honest piece. I hope that writing it and being here on Substack helps mitigate some of the feelings of loneliness you describe. I relate to so much of what you’ve written here: aging, declining social invitations out of exhaustion and feeling further isolated, repeating the same unhelpful patterns, feeling like I need to be the strong one. One of the main reasons I started my Substack is simply because I’m so dang lonely and isolated. I wanted to meet other writers and readers and share my heart so, again, I hope Substack is perhaps helping in similar ways. Thanks again for the piece 🙏🏻
Thanks so much. This is a great group of writers. I find the more I write, the less scarier it is (writing authentically) and the more others can relate.
I have felt alone most of my life and both of my parents are still alive. I felt alone as a child and took that into my adulthood. I realized that until I showed up for myself, I would always feel alone. I also read a book that helped me realize that my feeling of loneliness was the effect of having emotionally immature parents. That was a game changer for me. I feel like when you feel alone and look outside of yourself for connection, that can help sometimes, but when you look inside and feel connected to yourself, that helps all the time. Thank you for writing such a vulnerable piece. You are not alone.
Thanks so much Janine. I like your insight about being connected to yourself. I'm hoping my writing helps me reconnect to myself, while connecting with others
Thank you for sharing these reflections about loneliness, Jane. I am right with you-both parents gone, and moved across the world this year to start a new chapter, but find myself alone way more than I would like, despite enjoying my own company and being a very independent person. I am sitting here right this moment having one of those moments. It has been a great week. There are good things ahead. And yet in this moment after a long day of hard work I wish I had people to spend a chill Friday evening with and the few friends I have made in my new home are all busy, so I am sitting here with the feeling and trying to feel into its contours and see what else it might contain in addition to ache and fear….maybe self compassion? Or courage. Or even, if I really stretch, possibility? Grateful to have come across your words this evening.
I hit sent before I finished the message lol, but I lost my thought. I truly appreciate your comments and congratulations on the new chapter of your life
Thanks Ariana for your commenting and reading my post. I heat you absolutely, I enjoy my own company, and can be independent and the next minute I feel empty because of lack of connection, it's a push and pull for me if that makes sense. It's hard to go out after a day at work too. I'm self employed and it's isolating at times an my hours for work are non conventional. I'm learning how common it is for so many now to feel this way, especially with moving like you have
Jane, I saw this piece when Jacob shared it in Notes. I identify with many of the things you have discussed here. Even though I am naturally introverted, having a community and connections is important. In my experience, COVID amplified the great loneliness that many people were already feeling and caused it to exponentially grow. There is a great deal of loneliness and most of my own study on the topic has been as it relates to adult men. However, I appreciated reading your perspective here. Substack has been good for me in the connections made through the community of readers and writers. It is a great place to be, to make friends, and to explore our creative side. I wish you all the best.
Thank you and I think Covid has amplified this for so many. It has for me. Sometimes we get stuck ( I do) and technology make it easy to do. Community is so important
Thanks my friend! This is therapy for me,my writing. Thankful to have a friendship like yours that took us from the playground in first grade until now. Feeling blessed
@mikedeegan thank you so much for being my editor. I appreciate you reading and editing my work when I know you are tired after a long day at work. You are the best
Hi, Jane. I go with everything Jacob said. I just asked my therapist today if my new Substack connections are real friends, not like Rachel and Ross Friends. His answer was, Yes! I’m here, so I won’t be lonely, and you won’t either.
Thanks so much Wendy! Appreciate than you know. I was never a fan of Friends though, Seinfeld now those were my people 🤣
Seinfeld is quoted in my post for tomorrow, a quote from George. 🦕
Awesome! I'm looking forward to reading that, Wendy!
Where is the post? I want to read the quote!
Which post are you looking for? The one with Seinfeld line? Dating Dinosaurs post There is Good News and Bad News
Thank you!
Let me know if you enjoy it. 🦕
🙌 for Seinfeld!
Jane, thank you for this vulnerable and honest piece. I hope that writing it and being here on Substack helps mitigate some of the feelings of loneliness you describe. I relate to so much of what you’ve written here: aging, declining social invitations out of exhaustion and feeling further isolated, repeating the same unhelpful patterns, feeling like I need to be the strong one. One of the main reasons I started my Substack is simply because I’m so dang lonely and isolated. I wanted to meet other writers and readers and share my heart so, again, I hope Substack is perhaps helping in similar ways. Thanks again for the piece 🙏🏻
Thanks Jacob and thanks so much for sharing and restack. I'm thankful for this community of writers
Thanks so much. This is a great group of writers. I find the more I write, the less scarier it is (writing authentically) and the more others can relate.
Thanks for sharing this post Jacob. I enjoyed reading it.
Thank you. Thanks for commenting and reading my post
I have felt alone most of my life and both of my parents are still alive. I felt alone as a child and took that into my adulthood. I realized that until I showed up for myself, I would always feel alone. I also read a book that helped me realize that my feeling of loneliness was the effect of having emotionally immature parents. That was a game changer for me. I feel like when you feel alone and look outside of yourself for connection, that can help sometimes, but when you look inside and feel connected to yourself, that helps all the time. Thank you for writing such a vulnerable piece. You are not alone.
Thanks so much Janine. I like your insight about being connected to yourself. I'm hoping my writing helps me reconnect to myself, while connecting with others
Thank you for sharing these reflections about loneliness, Jane. I am right with you-both parents gone, and moved across the world this year to start a new chapter, but find myself alone way more than I would like, despite enjoying my own company and being a very independent person. I am sitting here right this moment having one of those moments. It has been a great week. There are good things ahead. And yet in this moment after a long day of hard work I wish I had people to spend a chill Friday evening with and the few friends I have made in my new home are all busy, so I am sitting here with the feeling and trying to feel into its contours and see what else it might contain in addition to ache and fear….maybe self compassion? Or courage. Or even, if I really stretch, possibility? Grateful to have come across your words this evening.
I hit sent before I finished the message lol, but I lost my thought. I truly appreciate your comments and congratulations on the new chapter of your life
Thanks Ariana for your commenting and reading my post. I heat you absolutely, I enjoy my own company, and can be independent and the next minute I feel empty because of lack of connection, it's a push and pull for me if that makes sense. It's hard to go out after a day at work too. I'm self employed and it's isolating at times an my hours for work are non conventional. I'm learning how common it is for so many now to feel this way, especially with moving like you have
Jane, I saw this piece when Jacob shared it in Notes. I identify with many of the things you have discussed here. Even though I am naturally introverted, having a community and connections is important. In my experience, COVID amplified the great loneliness that many people were already feeling and caused it to exponentially grow. There is a great deal of loneliness and most of my own study on the topic has been as it relates to adult men. However, I appreciated reading your perspective here. Substack has been good for me in the connections made through the community of readers and writers. It is a great place to be, to make friends, and to explore our creative side. I wish you all the best.
Thank you and I think Covid has amplified this for so many. It has for me. Sometimes we get stuck ( I do) and technology make it easy to do. Community is so important
I totally relate. Sending hugs. ❣️
Thanks my friend! This is therapy for me,my writing. Thankful to have a friendship like yours that took us from the playground in first grade until now. Feeling blessed
🥰❤