Edvard Munch . Artist. Painting . The Scream. Your photo here. Exudes same. One suggestion. Take a breather. For a few days. Your readers will be waiting.
THIS. I have a few images of this on my facebook that I posted during the pandemic (in which I also got Breast Cancer during the height of it) so my head was like this all . the . time. it's such good imagery. Jane is a gifted writer!! keep writing!!
Oh, I’m with you Jane, for real. My writing here is therapy, or at least suppose to be. It’s so hard to turn off all of the crap. Maybe a few hours in the sunshine with a cup of coffee and some great music of choice.
I feel like you, but not about writing…but life in general. I told my wife the other day I’m ready to move (which is coming in about 8 weeks…yay.), change my phone number, change my email and be done with doctors, prescriptions, insurance, organizations, government, politicians, solicitors and any other crap and just live for time I have left and to hell with the rest.
The tension running through this piece lives in the honesty between exhaustion and devotion, especially in the way writing is held as both refuge and pressure at the same time. The repetition of overwhelm, dopamine, and “slop” gives shape to a mind trying to stay afloat while still reaching for meaning in the act of expression. What feels most human here is the refusal to fully abandon the question of purpose, even in the middle of uncertainty about work, worth, and attention. I am grateful for the way you named that in-between space where creation and survival are still negotiating with each other.
Thanks, Holly. I'm trying to limit scrolling and easier said than done. I always try to make sure I read or actually listen to my writing. So many I end up listening to as I drive.
I rarely see you here Jane, but I saw this and I feel it. Keep going. For me it's a battle "not" to pay attention "to the end result." I enjoy the process of writing and creating so much that the end result can bring disappointment if I let it. I try and read as much as I write - but can feel very overwhelmed like everyone else. There's all the life things we also tend to, love to do, or not. We have trained ourselves "to see" the magazines, books, etc., we place in front of us. On coffee tables, the kitchen table, the bedside. "Reminders." Social media picked up on that and they are gaslighting us, removing those books and things from our sight and from our follower's sight. It's very sad and is causing a lot of depression in people. I finally asked today if anyone might let me know how I'm doing? that's a very vulnerable thing to do because it will still remain quiet. Which, if I let it, can make me feel I'm writing real crap. I don't think I am. But. So, I walk, garden, try to not pay attention and keep enjoying the process of this passion. Sending you a big hug Jane. ox
Thanks so much, Deborah. I appreciate you reaching out and commenting. Maybe it will help both of our algorithms lol. Seriously, there are so many I haven't seen and my #s are way less, but I love the reading and comment sections. I'll have to look up under your name. I absolutely have seen your photography and it is amazing.
It's sad with books and what is really infront of us. We don't see it and stare at a small rectangle. I'm speaking for myself of course. I'm trying.
Thanks again for stopping by. I hope all is going well.
I keep being fascinated by the way writing rewards us. It is not a classical kind of dopamine, nor anything we can measure - just something crawling, crumbling in the dark until it becomes real. A need finally exteriorized, a pressure that has found its place.
I write mostly poetry and essays in a personal, poetic form. I also write experimental fiction, weaving together multilingual elements, the eerie, and the occult.
I read your work! I only heart a post if I read it! and what Jennifer Ward Dudley said! Oh how I envision the Scream for myself! You have a lot of love on this post and all of your posts you are a very gifted writer! I can totally relate to your words. I too struggle, I do all of my writing for free, I have been writing my Memoir-ish for 3 years (really 54 years) I procrastinate and let the past swallow me up and re direct me. I was the most focused when I was trying to figure out a situation for some family members and I want to know why my brain zeroed in so well on his crisis and shut everything else out. I'm trying to focus that on my self now and I for some reason cannot apply that same focus to my own passions. It often feels like my brain is on fire, and that is why I crave sleep! I love that your business is in pets! My son works at a pet store and pet sits , I hope it turns into a career for him he has a real knack for it!
Thanks LJ. I can relate to so much for what you said with procrastinating and the past swallowing me up. I can zero in on a crisis as well but not the other details and I forget about myself.
I love the pet part of my business the pet part and people that is easy. It's the admin work that is driving me nuts now. I've had to step back for health reasons. Working 24/7 did me in over time. Hiring and managing means more work. I have a creative mind, and it doesn't mean with this part of it -all of the details invoicing etc. Computer issues have put me in a spin now and I doubt myself.
I appreciate your kind words and your support here I truly do.
It’s weird because I didn’t expect that would I love the admin part of my dad’s/families situations but I really actually liked that part. I conquered some fears in dealing with people.. (.but also, I get it. )
I’m sorry you have had some health issues, that is so hard when your body doesn’t want to cooperate with your mind or vice versa.
I don’t have enough time to read everyone I want to read, but I will always read you, Jane. I think it’s good to have a day job when you’re a writer, no matter how much we like to write. At least there are regular paychecks. One thing you have to do to survive, so you can actually do the the things you like or feel compelled to do.
Thanks, Carole. I wish I did have time to read them all. I have so many saved I haven't gotten to. Your's is always at the top of my list. Sometimes I have to search to find it. Darn algorithms.
Oh Jane, I’m frustrated for you hun. Right now, it appears you’re overloaded between work scheduling, and dealing with chronic pain. I always read what you write, but wasn’t on yesterday. Please don’t force anything and just go with the flow. It’s awful to have anxiety, and feel backed into a corner. If you want to write, even for just yourself, do it…writing is a wonderful release, so just journal. Feel better today, it’s been a really tough month! 🌷
I do write a lot. It’s fun and is the hardest work I know. It also drives me to go outside and look at trees and the sky. I spent 30 years as a technical writer. It’s in my inky blood now. I’ll die at the keyboard, probably, or with a book on my face.
Say, here is my first self published title. Short story collection. And Another Thing. I would never post this out on your main comments section. I buried it here, just between you and me.
I will usually read what you have written. If it grabs my attention off the jump I will read it and yours seem to have my attention good or bad. Keep writing and I will keep reading.
If I click like on a post it means I’ve read it…and I do read a lot of posts and notes here. And I feel like you do at times wanting to blow it all up. There is so much AI generated slop everywhere these days that I’m starting to feel a bit defeated. And not by the lifeless generic content that AI generates, but by the fact that so many humans are beginning to seem as fake as the bots that write for them 😢
When my mother died YOU were there for me. Ido read almost all your posts, I feel as ic I am not worthy to even comment. I do hit the little heart. Often. Sometimes I restack...You R Enough. We all get overwhelmed, andknowing someone else is feeling the same actually helps. I am not alone,and miether are yoi.
Edvard Munch . Artist. Painting . The Scream. Your photo here. Exudes same. One suggestion. Take a breather. For a few days. Your readers will be waiting.
THIS. I have a few images of this on my facebook that I posted during the pandemic (in which I also got Breast Cancer during the height of it) so my head was like this all . the . time. it's such good imagery. Jane is a gifted writer!! keep writing!!
Thanks so much, LJ. It's the inner turmoil many of us cannot see or show on the outside. You weny through so much with cancer and a pandemic as well.
I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment. I truly do!
Thanks, Jennifer. It's more my business. The administrative side of it which I hate. A huge headache
Oh, I’m with you Jane, for real. My writing here is therapy, or at least suppose to be. It’s so hard to turn off all of the crap. Maybe a few hours in the sunshine with a cup of coffee and some great music of choice.
I feel like you, but not about writing…but life in general. I told my wife the other day I’m ready to move (which is coming in about 8 weeks…yay.), change my phone number, change my email and be done with doctors, prescriptions, insurance, organizations, government, politicians, solicitors and any other crap and just live for time I have left and to hell with the rest.
I hear ya, Ken. Life is supposed to be easier with all of that and yet more complicated.
Where are you moving to?
Sheboygan Falls, WI
Nice! Happy moving!
The tension running through this piece lives in the honesty between exhaustion and devotion, especially in the way writing is held as both refuge and pressure at the same time. The repetition of overwhelm, dopamine, and “slop” gives shape to a mind trying to stay afloat while still reaching for meaning in the act of expression. What feels most human here is the refusal to fully abandon the question of purpose, even in the middle of uncertainty about work, worth, and attention. I am grateful for the way you named that in-between space where creation and survival are still negotiating with each other.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment on my writing.
Not scrolling helps me. Sometimes I just can’t. I try to read all of yours that come through in their entirety. Keep writing. It’s all we can do.
Thanks, Holly. I'm trying to limit scrolling and easier said than done. I always try to make sure I read or actually listen to my writing. So many I end up listening to as I drive.
I appreciate you!
I rarely see you here Jane, but I saw this and I feel it. Keep going. For me it's a battle "not" to pay attention "to the end result." I enjoy the process of writing and creating so much that the end result can bring disappointment if I let it. I try and read as much as I write - but can feel very overwhelmed like everyone else. There's all the life things we also tend to, love to do, or not. We have trained ourselves "to see" the magazines, books, etc., we place in front of us. On coffee tables, the kitchen table, the bedside. "Reminders." Social media picked up on that and they are gaslighting us, removing those books and things from our sight and from our follower's sight. It's very sad and is causing a lot of depression in people. I finally asked today if anyone might let me know how I'm doing? that's a very vulnerable thing to do because it will still remain quiet. Which, if I let it, can make me feel I'm writing real crap. I don't think I am. But. So, I walk, garden, try to not pay attention and keep enjoying the process of this passion. Sending you a big hug Jane. ox
Thanks so much, Deborah. I appreciate you reaching out and commenting. Maybe it will help both of our algorithms lol. Seriously, there are so many I haven't seen and my #s are way less, but I love the reading and comment sections. I'll have to look up under your name. I absolutely have seen your photography and it is amazing.
It's sad with books and what is really infront of us. We don't see it and stare at a small rectangle. I'm speaking for myself of course. I'm trying.
Thanks again for stopping by. I hope all is going well.
This resonates Jane. I think many of us are feeling this, these days.
👇
Unraveling or pivoting?
Am I unraveling or am I morphing into something new? A pivot? (I hate that word). Maybe, I am though.
Thanks, Peter! For sure!
You gotta. I get this post deeply
Thanks, Megan! I'm glad you could relate to this. I appreciate you taking the time to read and comment.
I keep being fascinated by the way writing rewards us. It is not a classical kind of dopamine, nor anything we can measure - just something crawling, crumbling in the dark until it becomes real. A need finally exteriorized, a pressure that has found its place.
Hi Jeanne! It is so rewarding and I would write all day. Thanks so much for taking time to comment and read here.
I'll have to check out your page. What kind of writing do you prefer the most to do?
I write mostly poetry and essays in a personal, poetic form. I also write experimental fiction, weaving together multilingual elements, the eerie, and the occult.
That sound interesting! I will be checking out your page. I discovered poetry a few months into Substack. I'm addicted now!
I read your work! I only heart a post if I read it! and what Jennifer Ward Dudley said! Oh how I envision the Scream for myself! You have a lot of love on this post and all of your posts you are a very gifted writer! I can totally relate to your words. I too struggle, I do all of my writing for free, I have been writing my Memoir-ish for 3 years (really 54 years) I procrastinate and let the past swallow me up and re direct me. I was the most focused when I was trying to figure out a situation for some family members and I want to know why my brain zeroed in so well on his crisis and shut everything else out. I'm trying to focus that on my self now and I for some reason cannot apply that same focus to my own passions. It often feels like my brain is on fire, and that is why I crave sleep! I love that your business is in pets! My son works at a pet store and pet sits , I hope it turns into a career for him he has a real knack for it!
Thanks LJ. I can relate to so much for what you said with procrastinating and the past swallowing me up. I can zero in on a crisis as well but not the other details and I forget about myself.
I love the pet part of my business the pet part and people that is easy. It's the admin work that is driving me nuts now. I've had to step back for health reasons. Working 24/7 did me in over time. Hiring and managing means more work. I have a creative mind, and it doesn't mean with this part of it -all of the details invoicing etc. Computer issues have put me in a spin now and I doubt myself.
I appreciate your kind words and your support here I truly do.
I'm so thankful you are here.
I am too!!
It’s weird because I didn’t expect that would I love the admin part of my dad’s/families situations but I really actually liked that part. I conquered some fears in dealing with people.. (.but also, I get it. )
I’m sorry you have had some health issues, that is so hard when your body doesn’t want to cooperate with your mind or vice versa.
Thanks! It's my knees that aren't very conducive to pet sitting and dog walking. I'm healthy otherwise
That's great with the admin part with your dad. Being an advocacte it sounds like. Sometimes we can tap into strengths and it is very impowering.
I totally understand yes it was a whole situation. Still is --but made some progress.
Thank you!
healing vibes for knees!
Thanks! It is what it is. I'm learning to accept it.
I allways read you
As I feel I do now
Hear you.
You are enough
Your words
Your poetry
Beautifully written
Lyrically composed
I'm retired
Long time now
I share your emotional
Ups and downs
Like a kite
Sometimes
I wrestle to control
You may have noticed
My running dopamine helps
Me
A lot
To settle and balance
Reflect
Not to judge myself
Unwisely
I am old
More wizened than wise
No edicts or advice
I hope
that simply
To hear you helps
My substack writing
Is a balm to me.
Let it be so
For you
As well
I, substack hears
You
You are
Much, much more
than enough
Perhaps
You underestimate
Your sharing helps
Others, like me too
Rest Easy Today
What did that poet say
" All will be well
All manner of things
Will be well "
All in good time
Thanks Steve for sharing your poetry. All will be well in time.
I don’t have enough time to read everyone I want to read, but I will always read you, Jane. I think it’s good to have a day job when you’re a writer, no matter how much we like to write. At least there are regular paychecks. One thing you have to do to survive, so you can actually do the the things you like or feel compelled to do.
Thanks, Carole. I wish I did have time to read them all. I have so many saved I haven't gotten to. Your's is always at the top of my list. Sometimes I have to search to find it. Darn algorithms.
Yeah, I think I’m very well buried somewhere. I still keep writing anyway.
Keep writing. I feel buried too and then for a few days I seem to “surface”. I think ss wants it that way.
Oh Jane, I’m frustrated for you hun. Right now, it appears you’re overloaded between work scheduling, and dealing with chronic pain. I always read what you write, but wasn’t on yesterday. Please don’t force anything and just go with the flow. It’s awful to have anxiety, and feel backed into a corner. If you want to write, even for just yourself, do it…writing is a wonderful release, so just journal. Feel better today, it’s been a really tough month! 🌷
Thanks, Jo-Ann. It's everything right now. Sometimes that happens. I am writing for myself and that won't stop :)
Awesome
First, drink some water. Go outside and look at the trees and sky. Breath.
Been there, rode the roller coaster for 55 years. Clackity Clack... Whoosh! HOLD ON!
It's going to work out okay. This rough spots will pass. You're a tough person and have guts coming out of your ears.
I know, I don't have any real direct answers. But I hear the pain and anxiety.
We, those of us you are compelled to write, are chased by a different kind of demon.
If you haven't started yet, It seems like it's time for Jane to turn on the demon and fight.
Just a rando popping off. But I like you. Don't stop believing!
Thanks so much, Wayne. If I could write all day it would be dandy, but I have a business to run that pays bills.
I do write a lot. It’s fun and is the hardest work I know. It also drives me to go outside and look at trees and the sky. I spent 30 years as a technical writer. It’s in my inky blood now. I’ll die at the keyboard, probably, or with a book on my face.
Say, here is my first self published title. Short story collection. And Another Thing. I would never post this out on your main comments section. I buried it here, just between you and me.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0H2KJN533/
Thanks for sharing. Congratulations on your book!
I will usually read what you have written. If it grabs my attention off the jump I will read it and yours seem to have my attention good or bad. Keep writing and I will keep reading.
Thanks so much, Paul. I appreciate it!
If I click like on a post it means I’ve read it…and I do read a lot of posts and notes here. And I feel like you do at times wanting to blow it all up. There is so much AI generated slop everywhere these days that I’m starting to feel a bit defeated. And not by the lifeless generic content that AI generates, but by the fact that so many humans are beginning to seem as fake as the bots that write for them 😢
Thanks, Darcy. So much ai slop. I'm glad I'm not alone feeling this way then I'm sad that other creators are dealing with this too.
I'm at the point where I have to wonder human or not. There is less authority and more shiny objects to click on.
No. Answers here just truth.
When my mother died YOU were there for me. Ido read almost all your posts, I feel as ic I am not worthy to even comment. I do hit the little heart. Often. Sometimes I restack...You R Enough. We all get overwhelmed, andknowing someone else is feeling the same actually helps. I am not alone,and miether are yoi.
Write on....dear one, Di
Thanks so much, Diana! It doesn't cross my mind that I could be there for someone else. I get too stuck in my head sometimes to realize that.
It's the overwhelm. Maycember as a parent, and a busy season and the list goes on.