I felt overwhelmed one Saturday morning in January. Saying I was overwhelmed was an understatement. I was recovering from Covid, day 8 to be exact. My husband was working and recovering as well. I needed to do grocery shopping and drop my teenage son off at an event. I thought, I’ll have to mask; the store will be crowded. I was exhausted, and I was grasping at reasons to get around it. Maybe I should do an online order? My anxiety grew as I imagined different scenarios. It would’ve been easier to crawl in my bed in a fetal position and sulk, like I had in the past few months. With depression, a chronic health condition, and grief it was so easy to do.
Giving into self-pity this time wasn’t the answer and it wasn't going to get the groceries here. It would only create more problems in the long run. A little languishing is OK and so is grieving the past, but there comes a time where you need to stop, and I was the only one that could do that. I resisted the urge to go back to bed and got dressed. I dried my hair, put on a little make up and I made it to the store. Moving forward in a straight line is the answer sometimes. Do you know what? I survived my trip to the grocery store. Yes, I was tired, but groceries were done, and that chore was no longer weighing on my mind.
We can also create fake scenarios in our minds, and the longer we do that, the more entangled they can become. It’s OK to sit with our feelings sometimes, but there comes a time when we need to stop and move on. We have to know when we get stuck and when it’s time for us to pull ourselves up so we can move forward with our lives.
I’m sulking in bed, reading your post. I did make it to the store for groceries but I’m back under the covers.