I haven’t felt a strong church connection in a very long time, which is pretty bad for a woman who was married to a (former) pastor. We did try to find a good fit, but we failed multiple times. My last church, the one we finally settled on, went bankrupt and closed up, but it was failing before that in my estimation. I barely got the time of day from the pastor, who I had to coach through my husband’s funeral. Now I associate church with grief and failure. I also work many weekends, and this does interfere with getting involved in any church activity, so I hear you with the pet sitting business, where weekends probably get even busier than the rest of the week. It’s hard to find a place with a good fit, where people are accepting, hospitable and outgoing, and it’s also hard to find a good preacher these days. I guess I’ll be going to some church tonight, one that has at least decent music, which is also important to me, and maybe that will make up for the other things it lacks. In the long term, church isn’t what I need right now—been there, done that. I feel like it was always about what they wanted from me and not what they had to offer. I know that sounds selfish, but I’ve experienced the politics and gossip and criticism of church, and that doesn’t suit me. I know God is always with me, and I can worship and honor him anywhere, anytime. Good luck with church hunting, when you decide that it’s for you, but in the meantime, I think it’s OK not to be there.
I say always trust your gut instincts… something felt off and uncomfortable. Putting the introverted personality aside for a moment, we need to follow our intuition. I feel this is God talking to us — it’s a different feeling from the introvert anxiety feeling. It’s hard for us introverts to distinguish the two things sometimes. Just the way you described it in this post made me think it isn’t the right fit for you at this moment. 🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
Janes this feels so similar. We attended a wonderful family Church in Eindhoven Holland when we lived there. But life moved on and we came to the UK. We were never able to find a Church where we felt as though we fitted. We tried some but truthfully it wasn't a good. So now, travelling we are content with each other.
But what struck me most in your writing is that it seems as though you were not approached and included. That must have felt awful.
Like most things in life I now, I tend to keep to myself and enjoy my quiet times in prayer and reading my Bible. Yes I miss the Church Family - who knows. One day that may come about.
Jane, I feel like we are kindred spirits. I can relate to so much of what you write. Covid marked the beginning of the end of me going to church. My mother got sick and passed during that time, and NO ONE was there for me. When the pastor bailed on doing her funeral 2 days before, that was it for me. I am not sure where my faith journey goes from here.
I haven’t felt a strong church connection in a very long time, which is pretty bad for a woman who was married to a (former) pastor. We did try to find a good fit, but we failed multiple times. My last church, the one we finally settled on, went bankrupt and closed up, but it was failing before that in my estimation. I barely got the time of day from the pastor, who I had to coach through my husband’s funeral. Now I associate church with grief and failure. I also work many weekends, and this does interfere with getting involved in any church activity, so I hear you with the pet sitting business, where weekends probably get even busier than the rest of the week. It’s hard to find a place with a good fit, where people are accepting, hospitable and outgoing, and it’s also hard to find a good preacher these days. I guess I’ll be going to some church tonight, one that has at least decent music, which is also important to me, and maybe that will make up for the other things it lacks. In the long term, church isn’t what I need right now—been there, done that. I feel like it was always about what they wanted from me and not what they had to offer. I know that sounds selfish, but I’ve experienced the politics and gossip and criticism of church, and that doesn’t suit me. I know God is always with me, and I can worship and honor him anywhere, anytime. Good luck with church hunting, when you decide that it’s for you, but in the meantime, I think it’s OK not to be there.
It does not sound selfish at all with politics, hypocrisy in many churches. So sad. When it comes down to it churches are businesses.
We went to one as well that went bankrupt. So, yes past experiences are hard to shake.
Maybe it’s about finding community somewhere not necessarily church.
I think we find what works for us in our own way. It sounds like you have
Thanks so much for stopping by to comment and share your experiences. I appreciate it
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas to you, too!🎄
I say always trust your gut instincts… something felt off and uncomfortable. Putting the introverted personality aside for a moment, we need to follow our intuition. I feel this is God talking to us — it’s a different feeling from the introvert anxiety feeling. It’s hard for us introverts to distinguish the two things sometimes. Just the way you described it in this post made me think it isn’t the right fit for you at this moment. 🙏🏻🙏🏻❤️
Thanks so much, Kathy.
Makes perfect sense
Janes this feels so similar. We attended a wonderful family Church in Eindhoven Holland when we lived there. But life moved on and we came to the UK. We were never able to find a Church where we felt as though we fitted. We tried some but truthfully it wasn't a good. So now, travelling we are content with each other.
But what struck me most in your writing is that it seems as though you were not approached and included. That must have felt awful.
Like most things in life I now, I tend to keep to myself and enjoy my quiet times in prayer and reading my Bible. Yes I miss the Church Family - who knows. One day that may come about.
Wishing you well. 💖
It's difficult. I wish it were easier to find a fit. I hear that
I appreciate you commenting and reading my post.
Yeah, not feeling included can feel horrible. It goes both ways I know. For myself it is a huge trigger.
Enjoying the quiet time as well at this season of life
I hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas!
Jane, I feel like we are kindred spirits. I can relate to so much of what you write. Covid marked the beginning of the end of me going to church. My mother got sick and passed during that time, and NO ONE was there for me. When the pastor bailed on doing her funeral 2 days before, that was it for me. I am not sure where my faith journey goes from here.
Thanks so much, Lisa!
I'm so sorry you went though all of that and the loss of youe mother.
That's so awful with the pastor, when you all needed him the most.
Not sure where my journey is going either. Maybe this is it, a quiet season, you know.
Transition.
I appreciate you taking the time to read and share your story.
Wishing you peace this Christmas
It does not sound selfish at all with politics, hypocrisy in many churches. So sad. When it comes down to it churches are businesses.
We went to one as well that went bankrupt. So, yes past experiences are hard to shake.
Maybe it’s about finding community somewhere not necessarily church.
I think we find what works for us in our own way. It sounds like you have
Thanks so much for stopping by to comment and share your experiences. I appreciate it
Merry Christmas!
It's difficult. I wish it were easier to find a fit. I hear that
I appreciate you commenting and reading my post.
Yeah, not feeling included can feel horrible. It goes both ways I know. For myself it is a huge trigger.
Enjoying the quiet time as well at this season of life
I hope you and your family have a wonderful Christmas!